Jeffree Star Skin Frost Fakeup Haul – Review and Swatches

I love makeup. I also love money. And I hate Jeffree Star, because as we all know the guy is a douche canoe. But his products? Want. So I cheated and bought a bunch of “Jeffree Star” fakeup for dirt cheap on Aliexpress. Now I’m not writing this to say you SHOULD buy this stuff. This is not a promotion of these products or any other fakeup. You need to know that first of all, counterfeit products are illegal and fakeup is very bad for you to the point of being dangerous. But if you want to do it I’m not going to stop you and you might as well have some information about the stuff, nah mean?

The other thing to consider here is the purpose of the makeup. As a performer I need some wild and intense stuff, but stuff that I will only need to wear for as little as five or so minutes at a time, that will be seen from a distance and under stage lighting. This is a totally different purpose than something you will wear all day every day. This is why I wouldn’t buy, say, fake foundation. But this stuff? This works for me. So here we go.

I own five fake Skin Frosts and five fake Velour Liquid Lipsticks. I own one real Velour Liquid lipstick so I can compare the quality to the real thing. The quality of these fake items varies by color (as do legitimate items, because different pigments affect the formula differently) and by seller, so I’m going to go through these item by item. Let’s just talk about the Skin Frosts here too because I realized as I started going through these that if I did all ten items at once this post would be stupid long.

The collection, including camera flash because I'm a hack

The collection, including camera flash because I’m a hack

The first thing you’ll notice is the difference in size of the highlighters. The big ones are full size, the small ones are not, and these smaller ones seem to be more standard. I have also used these, so the JS logo is coming off on some of them. But they all came with it when they were new. Also, the labeling is coming off the lipsticks. This also happens with the real ones, or at least the real one I have. I’m not going to focus too much on packaging here though because honestly who gives a shit. We know it’s fake, we don’t need to compare the differences. And you’re not walking around with the packaging on your face. The price and the fact that I bought these on freakin Aliexpress is the only clue you need that these are fake. As long as it works. Besides, what we really care about here is the quality and accuracy of the shades. So that’s what I am going to focus on.

In no particular order…

Skin Frost in Deep Freeze

The real thing

The real thing

What I received. I used the pic from Ali because my house is yellow and this was the only way I could show you the color accurately

What I received. I used the pic from Ali because my house is yellow and this was the only way I could show you the color accurately

Swatch

Swatch

Your first impression will no doubt be the same as mine. It’s not the same color! But honestly?… I like this color. A lot. I don’t know how practical it is as a highlight as opposed to an eyeshadow, but isn’t that how we all feel about the real thing too? So I can’t really complain about this. On my cheekbones I’ll use a light hand if and when I don’t want to look like an alien or a fairy prince. But I do intend on wearing this as a bright-ass eyeshadow. Yas. Whether it will eventually corrode a giant hole into my face and kill me? To be determined.

Skin Frost in Lavender Snow

The real thing

The real thing

What I received

What I received

lavendersnowswatch

Swatch

The color isn’t bad! I’m happy with it. These are all very soft/creamy and easy to blend. I must say though, that when I was swatching this one it was very chunky and had a lot of fallout. This isn’t nearly as much of an issue as when you use a brush instead of your finger. Just be gentle with it.

Skin Frost in Peach Goddess

The Real Thing

The Real Thing

What I received. Take one. Goddamnit, Voltaire

What I received. Take one. Goddamnit, Voltaire

Ok let's try this again. What I received, take 2.

Ok let’s try this again. What I received, take two.

Swatch

Swatch

This looks peach in the pan, but has a very cool, almost hot pink shift to it. I think the real one does too, though. I’m not mad at it. This one is also chunky and soft with lots of fallout, but not quite as much as Lavender Snow. Since this does go on fairly pigmented this should be used more as a blush I think. Otherwise it might come off looking pretty weird, mmkay?

Skin Frost in Ice Cold

The real thing

The real thing

What I received. I have to put them on the cat now, just work with me here.

What I received. I have to put them on the cat now, just work with me here.

Swatch

Swatch

So this one is obviously quite a bit smaller than the real thing, but you need to ask yourself, do you really care? I mean most of these things cost around five bucks and the real thing is huge. Do you really need that much product? No, you don’t. As for the product itself, I really like it. It’s true to the original’s silvery white shade, soft and blendable like the others, and plenty pigmented. Because white is a neutral and this doesn’t make me look all ashy, this highlighter is one of my standard go-tos.

Skin Frost in So Fucking Gold

The Real Thing

The Real Thing

What I received. Check out that mirror, I'm so unprofessional.

What I received. Check out that mirror, I’m so unprofessional.

sofuckinggoldswatch

How it looks on my face and eyes, because this is what I’m wearing right now. No comment on my lack of skill though. That’s not what this post is about, leave me alone!

Can you tell I use this one a lot? That cross hatch pattern is the pattern of the pan starting to come through. This shade is the same true gold as the real thing. It doesn’t put a gold stripe of pigment on my face, just some real golden glow. I love it. I have no issues with the formula or its smaller size. No complaints at all. Until it kills me anyway. Then I can legit call this fakeup a Beauty Killer. Hah!

So that’s it for the Skin Frosts. If JS doesn’t come over here to kick my ass I’ll be back later with a review of my five fake Velour Liquid Lipsticks. Pray for me, guys. This beauty shit can get ugly.

Advertisements

Big Boob Fakery and my first attempt at Youtube

You may remember a post I wrote a long time ago called Big Boob Fakery. Well… everything I wrote was a long time ago. So I figured it was time to freshen up my approach. I just made my first youtube video, a video version of Big Boob Fakery, and it’s hilarious in it’s amateurishness. Here’s to learning and growing and trying new things!

Coming Out Showers

I think coming out showers for trans people should be a thing.

Think about it. Cis people routinely have wedding showers and bar/bat mitzvahs. Trans people don’t always have these opportunities, at least not for their true genders. But what better way to show support and welcome them into the community of that true gender? These could be a rite of passage complete with gifts to help set them up for this new phase of their lives.

Now of course I need to stress here that not everyone will WANT a shower. And that should absolutely be respected. But for those that do want one, I can’t think of a more supportive and meaningful single gesture.

There should be cards too. Like “It’s a girl/boy/non-binary person!” but referring to someone who is not a baby. Happy things, because a person making the decision to live their lives as their true selves is something to be celebrated just as much as those other things we throw showers for.

Let’s spread the word and make this a thing for those who want it. Let’s celebrate people’s identities and welcome them into our communities as the people they are and help get them set up. Share this article if you agree!

Burlesque Beginners Dos and Donts

Aug16th2015-13

I’ve finally begun performing burlesque, and it’s been super hard work and a hell of a lot of fun. It’s had me somewhat creatively distracted for a while too, so it’s about time I check in with you guys here to teach you something new, in my usual by beginners for beginners format, with the help of my new partner Riley Strange!

So you’re intrigued by burlesque and you’ve never done it before, so you want to give it a shot. To go to shows and see the finished product on stage can feel pretty overwhelming when you have plans to try it out yourself. Just how does it all come together? If you don’t have a mentor to guide you you might be totally lost. Let us lay down a few simple dos and donts to get you started.

Riley prepared to go on stage for her Alice in Wonderland routine

Do…

-Your research. Learn by taking a class if there are any in your area, watching youtube videos, going to shows, reading up on burlesque history, and perusing informative websites such as 21stcenturyburlesque.com. Jo Weldon also has an awesome book on the subject that covers way more than I can here in a puny little blog article.

-Cut the damn tags off your clothes. As a performer you are delivering a fantasy. Tags and other flaws like stains, wrinkles and tears take the audience out of the moment.

-Be creative with your costume. Even if you must wear something off-the-rack, try to alter it in some way to make it one-of-a-kind. The last thing you want is someone in the audience pointing and going “Hey, I have that same bra at home!”

Adding rhinestones to these Victoria’s Secret panties add a little special sparkle

-Choose a song you absolutely love. With rehearsals you’ll have to listen to it a hundred times, so if you don’t love it, it’s going to be a nightmare to perform to once show day arrives.

-Be aware of what your audience will enjoy while not compromising your own tastes.

-Go big or go home. This is not a movie or a photoshoot, and there are no close-ups. Makeup and movements need to be seen from the back row. You WILL feel silly, at least in the beginning. You’ll get used to it.

-Make sure your stage name isn’t already taken by somebody else. A Google search should be pretty much all you need here.

-Make the most of your abilities. Any abilities. Dancing, acting, costuming, comedy, acrobatics, the list is endless.

-Be prepared for people to have misconceptions. Don’t get offended, it’s part of the deal. It’s up to you if you want to work towards changing their mind or not.

-Try to find a mentor if you can, to guide you through this stuff or just keep you company while you’re gluing on rhinestones.

-Consider the length and pacing of your song. You don’t want to feel rushed, or end up with nothing to do because the song was too long or slow.

-Be reliable and professional. This might be a fun job, but it is a job. It deserves to be taken seriously.

-Come to your show prepared. Remember not only the elements of your costume but makeup, pastie tape, a Tide stick, etc. This is the huge packing list Riley and I had last time we did a show, and this is only for three acts between us.

All this shit for less than 15 minutes total stage time. Also handy to make sure you leave nothing behind at the venue at the end of the night.

-Plan something achievable. This is something me and Riley have personal experience with. We kept coming up with extremely ambitious routines that were just way above our level. If you keep doing that you’ll never be able to complete the process to see it come to life on stage. You can keep having ambitious ideas, just tuck them away for a future date. A routine does not have to be difficult in order to be entertaining.

April 1 2016 - Heart-Shaped Box

Don’t…

-Think that the performances you see are the rules. This is art, there are no rules. You don’t have to wear a corset, you don’t have to choose a jazz song, you don’t have to know how to dance (although it helps) and believe it or not you don’t even have to be sexy. Let this be an expression of who you are, even if it only relates to one of your many facets. Well ok, there is one rule, and that is that you must be entertaining.

-Wear anything flat black unless your character depends on it. It’s too drab and somber. Either add some sparkle and shine or choose something more lively. Or better yet, both.

-Limit yourself. Explore new horizons and keep things fresh.

Just a backstage selfie with Adore Delano. No big deal 😛

-Focus on reasons why you “shouldn’t” do burlesque because it’s just not true. Any adult age, any gender, any body type, and any ability level (there are even burlesque performers who use wheelchairs in their acts) is accepted. This is the real beauty of this art form. It’s about celebrating what makes you you.

-Forget your face in your choreography. It just won’t look good if you look like you’re taking a shit while you get undressed.

-Be a diva. Ok this isn’t just a burlesque tip, this is a life tip. There’s a difference between honestly expressing something that’s important to you and acting like a spoiled child about it. You’re not above anyone.

-Panic if something goes wrong. Because it will, even to seasoned performers. But guess what, the audience probably doesn’t know, and if they do they’ll think highly of you for being able to just move on with the act instead of freezing in a panic. Riley and I have both performed to the wrong track when the DJ made a mistake, and neither time could anyone in the audience tell. Keep in mind we are both still beginners. It happened to Riley on her second day.

-Make excuses! You’ll just keep missing out.

What to Expect at a Typical Burlesque Show, By Dr. Lucky

I’ve been deeply ensconced in burlesque for a while, and I’m constantly reminded that not everyone is privy to my insular world. So I wrote this as an introduction to those who may be curious or interested or concerned. This list is in no way meant to be ‘definitive’ or to ‘set the record straight’ about what to expect at a burlesque show. As with all live performance, the best way to experience burlesque it is to see it in person.

1. A Variety Format Show

Shows usually feature a host or master of ceremonies who keeps the show moving forward, introduces acts, and interacts with the audience, which may include audience participation. Performers often come from a variety of backgrounds and have an array of skill sets, and may include dancers, singers, musicians, circus performers, magicians, comedians, and, yes, striptease artists. In modern burlesque, acts are usually around five minutes, or the length of a pop song, though this can vary widely with ‘talking acts’ or headliners who may perform to a number of songs.

2. Acts that are as Uniquely Different as the Performers

Burlesque performers are not given a ‘script’ – they come up with their stage personas and concepts for their acts; they choose their music, choreograph their numbers, and usually create their own costumes. It is this DIY spirit, and complete control of one’s image, that is so appealing to performers and audience alike. Some performers like to keep their acts in the vein of classic burlesque, bedecked in gowns, panels skirts, boas, fans, gloves, and stockings etc., while others create acts influenced by popular culture, politics, current events, and/or familiar archetypes.
Inga Ingenue. ©Michael Albov (What to Expect at a Typical Burlesque Show)Inga Ingenue. ©Michael Albov (What to Expect at a Typical Burlesque Show)

3. Acts are Like ‘Mini Plays’

Dixie Evans, the Marilyn Monroe of Burlesque and curator of the Exotic World Museum and Competition, described her acts as ‘mini plays’. An act has its own narrative, story, tone, and message. The ending of a striptease act may be more about a resolution of the tension of the story, or the delivering of a punch line, then it is solely about the physical reveal. That said, the reveal and the message are often intertwined, and can be dependent on each other. Burlesque acts, like other narratives, take the audience on a journey.

4. Over the Top Presentation of Self

You probably won’t see a parade of ‘girl-next-door’ realness at a burlesque show. Makeup is excessive, hair is big (often a wig), and costumes are elaborate. The performance style is more like Brechtian presentation than Aristotelian representation – think clowns, buffoons, and drag queens. The burlesque condition known as ‘Swarovski-itis’ is a serious affliction that compels performers to want to put rhinestones on EVERYTHING. Expect to be blinded by the light.

5. No Fourth Wall

With most traditional theatre or performance genres, there’s an ‘invisible’ fourth wall that divides performers from the audience. There’s no such thing in burlesque. This makes burlesque more participatory and engaging than your typical entertainment experience. In fact, the audience is an integral part of a burlesque show, and it is that carnivalesque (Bahktin) spirit that is so much fun for audience and performers. I can’t think of many social situations where it is not just acceptable to scream at a performer as she performs, but expected. Audience members don’t have to sit, hands folded on lap, and wait until the end of the show to show their appreciation. They do it along the way – with claps, hoots, hollers and screams of laughter and approval. And that’s just the way the performers like it.

6. A Mixed Audience Comprised Mostly of Women and Couples

An audience at burlesque show tends to be mixed, and the demographics run the gamut from grandmas to girls out for a night on the town. Although it depends on the venue, producer, and the show, burlesque shows are most often very women-friendly. Rarely do you see primarily male audiences, except perhaps at a boylesque show. Couples are frequent attendees. Heteronormativity is not the expected norm.

7. Blue Humour and Content

Some would argue that blue humour and content of burlesque is its most important and defining characteristic. But like at a burlesque show, you might have to wait for the blue content. Furthermore, blue humour does not necessarily have to be explicitly ‘dirty’. It can be the implication of a double entendre, the delivery of a line with a wink and a nudge. So put your thinking cap on, otherwise you might miss the joke.
Aurora Galore. ©Chris Harman/Harman House Photography (What to Expect at a Typical Burlesque Show)Aurora Galore. ©Chris Harman/Harman House Photography (What to Expect at a Typical Burlesque Show)

8. Modern Political and Social Conscientiousness

Modern burlesque is the thinking person’s performance art wrapped up in a sparkly package. You may want to be up on current events before you come to a show. Politics and social commentary are often very central to burlesque acts. And even if not overt, there’s still something political about performers doing whatever they want on stage, force feeding it to an audience, and getting the audience to beg for more. This can be terrifying to those who want to keep established gender roles in place, and is often a driving force behind fear or censorship of burlesque and burlesque performers.

9. Burlesque is Parody

If there’s one thing that has been consistent about burlesque since its inception, it is parody. Parody was an intrinsic part of burlesque, even before striptease emerged. In fact, ‘to burlesque’ a thing means to poke fun at it. Nothing escapes burlesque’s parodic grip, and it is that inversion of high and low that is the delicious raison d’être of burlesque. So don’t be surprised if something you hold up as sacred is poked fun at, or something you think frivolous (or perhaps deviant) is celebrated and elevated. This is what burlesque does – it inverts social norms, pokes fun, and, ultimately, is meant to BE fun. Comedy is the central tenet to this fun.

10. Expect the Unexpected

‘Wait a minute. Dr. Lucky. I just went to my first burlesque show, and it was not what you described.’ Welcome to the world of burlesque! If there’s one thing I’ve learned from burlesque in the past fifteen plus years, it is that the only thing you can expect is the unexpected. As with any kind of live performance, the best way to experience it is to go to a show. Go with an open mind. And expect to be entertained.

NOTE: Wish you could include this in your next program? You can! Feel free to use ‘What to Expect at a Burlesque Show’ for your program, your website, or to send to reporters and/or local concerned community members. If this article is reused in part or in whole, author credit is required (‘Dr. Lucky’), with a note to the author (doctorofburlesque@yahoo.com) about where and when the reprint is published. All rights reserved, 2014.

Acknowledgements: Thank you to Kay Sera and Taro Baugham for feedback on an earlier draft of this essay.

Dr. Lucky

My super simple super awesome skincare routine

I’ve never had the best skin. Adult acne has always been a thing for me, and it’s just so damn sensitive I get a rash when almost anything touches it. But lately I’m seeing some real improvement. It’s clearer and more even-toned than it’s been since before I hit puberty, and damn, it’s so bright! And this routine is why. Going simple and natural on my hair was one of the best things I ever did, so of course it stands to reason that this approach would be great on my skin too. So here it is, and it’s nothing but oil and vinegar.

Skin

A completely makeup-free selfie. Not something I’d have done before.

  1. Wet face
  2. Oil cleanse. Drying out your skin causes it to freak out and produce more oil to compensate, so working in a good oil calms this down. So now you still have oil on your face, but instead of greasy zit-causing oil it’s really good, clean, softness causing oil. Just make sure the oil you pick is non-comedogenic. I’m in love with jojoba. Stay away from coconut (at least on your face).
  3. I scrub this off with a microfiber cloth. Mine is the Makeup Eraser.
  4. Tone. Interestingly enough, the best toner I know of is diluted organic apple cider vinegar. This is the exact same stuff I use on my hair, and my ratio is about 1:4 with water. I don’t want to get into this whole science-y description of why, but the short of it is that it has a PH level close to that of your skin, protects the acid mantle, and is natural anti-bacterial goodness. Look it up.
  5. Gently pat dry.
  6. A little more jojoba oil to act as a moisturizer.
  7. Struggle not to touch your face because OMG it’s so soft!!

So there you go. If your skin is troublesome and you don’t want to get too complicated or expensive with your skincare routine, give this a go.

A tiny little post about binders

I’ve always made a habit of writing things as I learn them, to share beginner-friendly tips and tricks. But since I’ve been distracted, idea-less, and therefor silent for a while, I realized while going through some old posts that there’s probably some stuff I forgot to tell you about. Maybe this isn’t enough for a full-length post, but please comment below if you want to see anything else here and I’ll add to it.

Ok, so, binders. Yes, since the creation of this blog I have done quite a bit towards figuring myself out. I’m still fem as fuck, but a binder was in order. I’ve learned a precious few little things about them that suit me quite well, and that you might find helpful.

  1. You won’t be flat. Just MORE flat. Guess what, dudes aren’t usually totally flat either. So just suck it up, you’re fine.
  2. There is a serious lack of pretty binders. Bitch, trans-masc people can also like pretty things, and there are even some (both cis and trans) women who bind, too! Maybe one day I’ll be able to do something about it. Ok, that wasn’t super helpful…
  3. Speaking of #1, you probably won’t be too happy with your shape in a binder alone. This is discouraging, I know. The trick here is to distract the eye. Thankfully, this isn’t hard to do at all. Just some kind of looser or random lines around the area do the trick. Not wearing a form-fitting tshirt is pretty key here. Any clothes that are looser will look just fine.
  4. I personally prefer full-length tank styles over half styles. They don’t look like bras, they can also compress your hips, and you can wear them exposed. I like mine with this sweater or an open button-down. In both outfits I’ve been asked what my binder looked like. When I told them they were looking at it, they were surprised. Success!
  5. Yes, they can be hot. But see above for help with that. It really doesn’t need to be that much of an extra layer if you treat it more like a shirt in itself.

That’s all I got for now. It’s not a lot, but it’s been a pretty big deal towards helping me deal with trying to feel a little more comfortable in my own skin. Hopefully this post is a sign of more to come.

Pictured: resting sad face concealing a fair amount of happiness.