“Everybody is Just Jealous!” : Trying to Debunk Beauty

Being attractive is obviously not such a bad thing. But it’s not always a good thing either. While I strongly believe the whole “Everybody is jealous of me!” statement is a pathetic excuse not to have to look at your own flaws, there are definitely some issues here worth looking into. Like everything in life, it looks different from different angles, and having a better understanding of it can help you both navigate different social situations and avoid using it as “the anesthetic used to ease the pain of stupidity.”

Like I said, whether it’s true or not, leaning on this means that you won’t be looking at the flaws you do have, easily turning you into the sort of arrogant jerk who actually deserves such treatment. It’s for this reason that I never recommend it. Ever. If you catch yourself saying this, unless you have absolute proof (the person told you so and you took it in the CORRECT CONTEXT) know that you WILL be ridiculed later on.

Oh, and a word about that context. Someone might tell you they are jealous of an opportunity you have, or of your house, or some other part of your life, but this does not mean they are jealous of you as a person and/or your whole life. Again, keep the arrogance in check, please.

Nevertheless, this sort of thing can happen, and it’s important to know why. Women are naturally programmed to compete with each other. It’s a primitive (yes, PRIMITIVE) instinct used for snagging a man, much like the douchebags in a club who beat each other up because one of them looked at the other’s woman. It’s easy for them to see each other as a threat, even when such a notion is beyond silly. This is where we get the tag line, “don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.” Have you ever done this? If so, it’s important to remember the same things you might want to remember when it comes to an “ugly” person; that they can’t help it, and it says nothing about the person’s personality, intelligence, or intentions. Just because you see a beautiful woman does not mean you can jump to the conclusion that she’s going to be a bitch to you and steal your boyfriend. If she does, it’s more likely a result of her bad personality. So if you must hate someone, at least make sure it’s for a better reason than “she has prettier hair than me,” and if another girl hates you, maybe don’t assume so quickly that it’s because she just wants your shoes. More than likely, you’re coming across as somewhat unpleasant. Work on that, I promise you’ll see a difference.

On the other side of the coin, psychologists tell us that we often judge a person’s personality (I’m guessing this is more likely to be a person of the opposite sex, but not always) based on their looks. If someone looks good, we automatically assume they are a good person. You can see this theory in action on the episode of “What Would You Do?” where they have various people stealing a bike to see which of them will be confronted. Unsurprisingly, the beautiful woman was not. Instead, she was judged to be the owner of the bike who may have just lost her key. So this brings me to two points. First of all, just because you are attractive does not mean you get to be a jerk, because you assume you won’t as likely be perceived as one. There is no excuse for that kind of behavior. Beautiful on the outside and ugly on the inside just equals ugly, plain and simple. The second point is that just because you’re a hot chick and guys are nice to you, does not always (Ok, it does SOMETIMES) mean that they want to sleep with you. On South Park when Bebe got boobs, the boys didn’t even know what sex was yet; they all started thinking she was “really, really smart.” I’m sure if they were older it wouldn’t have gone down quite that way, but the theory still stands. There is a good chance that they just see an attractive girl and therefor are also seeing a girl with attractive qualities. They’ll be more likely to actually want to sleep with you, and STAY with you if you try to live up to those qualities.

I guess this can all be summed up by saying that you should never jump to conclusions about a person, whether it be what kind of person they are based on what they look like, or their motives towards you based on what you look like – or THINK you look like for that matter. We are a species that judges people. If we must do this, let’s judge each other for our personalities, not our bodies.

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