Jeffree Star Skin Frost Fakeup Haul – Review and Swatches

I love makeup. I also love money. And I hate Jeffree Star, because as we all know the guy is a douche canoe. But his products? Want. So I cheated and bought a bunch of “Jeffree Star” fakeup for dirt cheap on Aliexpress. Now I’m not writing this to say you SHOULD buy this stuff. This is not a promotion of these products or any other fakeup. You need to know that first of all, counterfeit products are illegal and fakeup is very bad for you to the point of being dangerous. But if you want to do it I’m not going to stop you and you might as well have some information about the stuff, nah mean?

The other thing to consider here is the purpose of the makeup. As a performer I need some wild and intense stuff, but stuff that I will only need to wear for as little as five or so minutes at a time, that will be seen from a distance and under stage lighting. This is a totally different purpose than something you will wear all day every day. This is why I wouldn’t buy, say, fake foundation. But this stuff? This works for me. So here we go.

I own five fake Skin Frosts and five fake Velour Liquid Lipsticks. I own one real Velour Liquid lipstick so I can compare the quality to the real thing. The quality of these fake items varies by color (as do legitimate items, because different pigments affect the formula differently) and by seller, so I’m going to go through these item by item. Let’s just talk about the Skin Frosts here too because I realized as I started going through these that if I did all ten items at once this post would be stupid long.

The collection, including camera flash because I'm a hack

The collection, including camera flash because I’m a hack

The first thing you’ll notice is the difference in size of the highlighters. The big ones are full size, the small ones are not, and these smaller ones seem to be more standard. I have also used these, so the JS logo is coming off on some of them. But they all came with it when they were new. Also, the labeling is coming off the lipsticks. This also happens with the real ones, or at least the real one I have. I’m not going to focus too much on packaging here though because honestly who gives a shit. We know it’s fake, we don’t need to compare the differences. And you’re not walking around with the packaging on your face. The price and the fact that I bought these on freakin Aliexpress is the only clue you need that these are fake. As long as it works. Besides, what we really care about here is the quality and accuracy of the shades. So that’s what I am going to focus on.

In no particular order…

Skin Frost in Deep Freeze

The real thing

The real thing

What I received. I used the pic from Ali because my house is yellow and this was the only way I could show you the color accurately

What I received. I used the pic from Ali because my house is yellow and this was the only way I could show you the color accurately

Swatch

Swatch

Your first impression will no doubt be the same as mine. It’s not the same color! But honestly?… I like this color. A lot. I don’t know how practical it is as a highlight as opposed to an eyeshadow, but isn’t that how we all feel about the real thing too? So I can’t really complain about this. On my cheekbones I’ll use a light hand if and when I don’t want to look like an alien or a fairy prince. But I do intend on wearing this as a bright-ass eyeshadow. Yas. Whether it will eventually corrode a giant hole into my face and kill me? To be determined.

Skin Frost in Lavender Snow

The real thing

The real thing

What I received

What I received

lavendersnowswatch

Swatch

The color isn’t bad! I’m happy with it. These are all very soft/creamy and easy to blend. I must say though, that when I was swatching this one it was very chunky and had a lot of fallout. This isn’t nearly as much of an issue as when you use a brush instead of your finger. Just be gentle with it.

Skin Frost in Peach Goddess

The Real Thing

The Real Thing

What I received. Take one. Goddamnit, Voltaire

What I received. Take one. Goddamnit, Voltaire

Ok let's try this again. What I received, take 2.

Ok let’s try this again. What I received, take two.

Swatch

Swatch

This looks peach in the pan, but has a very cool, almost hot pink shift to it. I think the real one does too, though. I’m not mad at it. This one is also chunky and soft with lots of fallout, but not quite as much as Lavender Snow. Since this does go on fairly pigmented this should be used more as a blush I think. Otherwise it might come off looking pretty weird, mmkay?

Skin Frost in Ice Cold

The real thing

The real thing

What I received. I have to put them on the cat now, just work with me here.

What I received. I have to put them on the cat now, just work with me here.

Swatch

Swatch

So this one is obviously quite a bit smaller than the real thing, but you need to ask yourself, do you really care? I mean most of these things cost around five bucks and the real thing is huge. Do you really need that much product? No, you don’t. As for the product itself, I really like it. It’s true to the original’s silvery white shade, soft and blendable like the others, and plenty pigmented. Because white is a neutral and this doesn’t make me look all ashy, this highlighter is one of my standard go-tos.

Skin Frost in So Fucking Gold

The Real Thing

The Real Thing

What I received. Check out that mirror, I'm so unprofessional.

What I received. Check out that mirror, I’m so unprofessional.

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How it looks on my face and eyes, because this is what I’m wearing right now. No comment on my lack of skill though. That’s not what this post is about, leave me alone!

Can you tell I use this one a lot? That cross hatch pattern is the pattern of the pan starting to come through. This shade is the same true gold as the real thing. It doesn’t put a gold stripe of pigment on my face, just some real golden glow. I love it. I have no issues with the formula or its smaller size. No complaints at all. Until it kills me anyway. Then I can legit call this fakeup a Beauty Killer. Hah!

So that’s it for the Skin Frosts. If JS doesn’t come over here to kick my ass I’ll be back later with a review of my five fake Velour Liquid Lipsticks. Pray for me, guys. This beauty shit can get ugly.

Big Boob Fakery and my first attempt at Youtube

You may remember a post I wrote a long time ago called Big Boob Fakery. Well… everything I wrote was a long time ago. So I figured it was time to freshen up my approach. I just made my first youtube video, a video version of Big Boob Fakery, and it’s hilarious in it’s amateurishness. Here’s to learning and growing and trying new things!

My super simple super awesome skincare routine

I’ve never had the best skin. Adult acne has always been a thing for me, and it’s just so damn sensitive I get a rash when almost anything touches it. But lately I’m seeing some real improvement. It’s clearer and more even-toned than it’s been since before I hit puberty, and damn, it’s so bright! And this routine is why. Going simple and natural on my hair was one of the best things I ever did, so of course it stands to reason that this approach would be great on my skin too. So here it is, and it’s nothing but oil and vinegar.

Skin

A completely makeup-free selfie. Not something I’d have done before.

  1. Wet face
  2. Oil cleanse. Drying out your skin causes it to freak out and produce more oil to compensate, so working in a good oil calms this down. So now you still have oil on your face, but instead of greasy zit-causing oil it’s really good, clean, softness causing oil. Just make sure the oil you pick is non-comedogenic. I’m in love with jojoba. Stay away from coconut (at least on your face).
  3. I scrub this off with a microfiber cloth. Mine is the Makeup Eraser.
  4. Tone. Interestingly enough, the best toner I know of is diluted organic apple cider vinegar. This is the exact same stuff I use on my hair, and my ratio is about 1:4 with water. I don’t want to get into this whole science-y description of why, but the short of it is that it has a PH level close to that of your skin, protects the acid mantle, and is natural anti-bacterial goodness. Look it up.
  5. Gently pat dry.
  6. A little more jojoba oil to act as a moisturizer.
  7. Struggle not to touch your face because OMG it’s so soft!!

So there you go. If your skin is troublesome and you don’t want to get too complicated or expensive with your skincare routine, give this a go.

Androgynous Style

Whether you’re agender, third gender, both genders, or just looking to explore new style territory, androgynous style can be a challenge. But for women, this can be easier to pull off for than for men. Not that men should ever be concerned about what others think either! And while this post is primarily geared towards bio-women, bio-men may find something useful in this as well. Androgyny is for everyone after all. Now, I’ve come to understand that those who really aren’t looking for a feminine style tend to dress a little… lazy. I don’t mean this as a judgement. But when you’re unsure or just a little apathetic, jeans and tshirts can get you into a bit of a rut. Here are some fresh ideas, along with some basics for those looking to try this out for the first time.

First of all, the most important thing I think to ask yourself is – What elements of my current style would I keep if I suddenly woke up in a man’s (or woman’s) body? Even if your answer includes dresses and skirts, these things are part of your style that really fit you and represent who you are. Keep them, no matter how girly (or masculine) they may be. Your answer to this may change day to day and that’s ok too. I know for a fact that if I was a dude I would totally still rock long pointed nails, though I may be more bothered by it when a fresh dye-job stains them pink. Also not such a great idea for job interviews.

Clothes. While I still recommend clothing made for women as they’re tailored to the shape of your body, we’re lucky that unlike it was in the past, it’s easy to find women’s clothes that are inspired by menswear. There are also varying degrees of this and in various styles. We can easily find traditional and edgy suits, boyfriend jeans, and unisex items like tshirts and sweaters, and button downs in any store. Trench coats and pea coats are universally flattering. For underneath, minimizing bras and shapewear for the hips will help streamline those curves, should you so desire.

Accessories. You might not want to wear a tie in the traditional way, but have you thought about wearing one as a belt? Sweater vests look awesome on anyone, and while you may want to skip jewelry altogether, keeping things basic or edgy is a way to make it work with this style. Unisex perfume is available at various shops such as Goth Rosary. Newsboy hats are adorable and dapper. And call me a hipster, but I love pocket watches. I’ve also been known to wear a black underbust corset (of course) in the style of a waistcoat. For many of us, ditching a bag isn’t an option, but you don’t have to carry a traditional purse. Book bags and laptop bags can be carried by anyone. My own favorites are messenger bags because I can wear them instead of carrying them and they’re big enough for my books and all the garbage that eventually piles up inside. These bags also tend to appear much more simple and casual than girly. My new one has a ouija board design.

Hair. You don’t have to get a pixie cut, though I have to say this is gorgeous. Women don’t have a monopoly on long hair, so keep that in mind. For style, simple and natural does the trick. If you like curling your hair, go for tousled waves over perfect ringlets. Bed-head, slicked back, a classic low ponytail or just regular ol’ down are easy. Some other fun options are a pompadour with a ponytail or french twist, or hidden under a hat. If you have long hair and want to fake a cut, sweep your hair back and over your head so that the ends fall down your forehead like bangs. Use a firm headband to hold this in place. Then hide the the majority of it with a hat, and style the front however you like, such as side-swept, bed-head, or spikey. For color consider going all natural, super natural-looking, or try bright and fun colors like blue and green. I’d stay away from natural colors in unnatural shades, like the type of thing you get with brands like Feria.

Makeup. Of course, skipping makeup altogether is the most obvious option, but some of us just aren’t that brave or laid back. To bring out your best without obviously having anything on, try BB cream or a light foundation, translucent powder, and some light bronzer on your temples and under your cheek bones for dimension and contouring. If a more obvious look is more your style, try a bold eye in a neutral color like black or grey, and keep lips looking more natural with a clear or neutral lip balm.

While there’s plenty other info out there on feminine looks inspired by men, there’s an unfortunate lack for those who just want to appear truly androgynous. So if you have any ideas or tips to share please comment or share some pics! Let’s brainstorm this up.

The All Natural Face – Cleanser & Makeup Remover

While I don’t have any issues with the food chain itself per se, I do have an issue with animal cruelty, and I find it especially unnecessary when it comes to our appearance. So for this reason and because I’ve been gradually switching to a more earth-friendly lifestyle, I was excited to try out a few vegan products from The All Natural Face.

I have extremely sensitive skin, and I have to tell you, a bonus of not cleansing with chemical detergents means it’s not being irritated for the first time in about 15 years. My face isn’t getting puffy and red when I wash it, and this is so unusual to me I almost doubt whether it’s actually clean. I had no idea I was even doing anything wrong before until I switched. I always thought my skin was bad, and it turns out it probably isn’t. It’s just that my “gentle” commercial cleansers still weren’t gentle enough. Because as soon as I stopped, well holy crap, everything started getting back in order.

I didn’t need any new makeup when I first started browsing, but I was determined to switch to a natural cleanser (I used castile soap to great effect until this arrived), so I bought the Luscious Lavender Facial Cleanser and Makeup Remover and Oil Makeup Remover Pads. All the products from this company are extremely affordable at about the same or less than what you would pay in a drug store, shipping is so cheap you’ll think there was a glitch, and anything that comes in a container can be purchased as a refill instead of an entirely new item. It’s generally assumed that truly all-natural products are expensive, but this isn’t at all the case here.

The cleanser smells and looks a lot like yogurt. And it feels like yogurt too. It doesn’t lather at all like a traditional cleanser, so this is a bit weird and takes some getting used to. But unlike actually attempting to use food to wash your face, it works amazingly well. With my old cleanser I always had to rub my eyes really hard to get my makeup off, but this takes very little effort. Afterwards my face feels super clean but with no tightness or residue. It’s just pure, clean skin. And my eyes don’t sting from it either! Great stuff!

The oil pads have no scent at all, and are very small. I was concerned that they wouldn’t be enough to clean my whole face. I use both sides, but I don’t quite need two. If you need a second, the low price should keep you from being too concerned. One big difference between these cleansing pads and what you may be used to is that they don’t clean with your idea of a traditional cleanser but with a mixture of different plant oils. It does make your face oily, but it’s not in a bad way. It’s a nice moisturizing kind of oil, and you just give it a quick rinse afterwards. It leaves my skin feeling really nicely moisturized, and that really is a first. Over time I’m even noticing that I’m waking up much less greasy than I used to. The reason for this is when you use oils on your face that mimic your skin’s natural oils, it no longer feels the need to produce more to compensate from any drying you may have done to it from regular soap. So even though the oil is another thing to get used to, it’s still totally worth it in the end.

For stuff that works this well, for less than I would pay at Walmart even after shipping, this stuff is winning all the way. And after only two weeks of use, my skin looks a lot better. If I had to run out of the house without makeup on, I wouldn’t be all that embarrassed anymore. And when I run out of any makeup items I have I’m going to give this brand a try for that, too. Who knows how great I’ll look then. And besides, karma looks great on everybody.

It’s Nice Not to Wear Makeup Sometimes

Some of my most vivid childhood memories involve me standing in the hallway outside the bathroom doorway, looking up at my mom as she did her makeup every day. It was the 80s, so the colors she used were bright; I distinctly remember fuschia and royal blue. I associate a lot about appearances with my mom. She has a very low self-esteem (I recently told her I liked her hair as it was growing longer, and she responded by saying she felt like a cow), was worried about how we made her look as kids, and threatened (probably not 100% seriously) to not let me walk in her wedding when I had a big zit when I was 11. I remember how deeply humiliating it was for her and her friend to spend so long fussing over it trying to pop it and make it go away. I didn’t think it should matter, I mean was it REALLY that big a deal? I’m your own family, Mom! But whether consciously or because she was just unknowingly perpetuating the pressures she felt growing up herself, one of the lessons she worked hard to teach me was that looks were Very Important.

School didn’t help either. I wore hand-me-downs and got made fun of constantly. I didn’t agree with their judgments  honestly, I think I was probably mentally healthier as a kid than I am now, but I was sick and tired of it enough that before 7th grade rolled around I was trying very hard to choose clothes that they couldn’t tease me for, and the All Black Era was ushered in. Then the teenage angst kicked in, and I specifically recall that unlike being an adult and sighing wistfully at a magazine ad thinking how nice it would be to look like that model, you wouldn’t just like to look that way, you think you NEED to look that way. These women are *everything* and you are *nothing.* Everything is a bigger deal when you’re younger.

But what happens when you grow up? You don’t take it quite as seriously – you at least become aware on a logical level that perfection isn’t even a thing, if not on an emotional one. But old habits die hard, especially when we’re surrounded by the same pressures we always were. And it’s that divide between logical and emotional that often needs to be addressed. I believe in taking pride in yourself and not being just gratuitously gross, but what’s all that gross about a natural face on an ordinary day? This sort of cultural assumption that it is is a big problem.

So I think it would be fantastic if every so often we could take a break from makeup to just plain get over ourselves. On days I’ve worn little enough that people at least thought I wasn’t wearing any, nobody died, or even insulted me. One day I even got a very nice and deliberate compliment from a coworker. Of course, I was not literally without makeup, I’m not there yet. But part of the reason for that is that I don’t like my skin, and one way to get better skin is to stop putting so much shit all over it. So stepping out of my comfort zone could have multiple benefits.

I think makeup is one really great method of artistic expression and some women really enjoy it. Sometimes I’m one of them. But when it becomes more of a chore than a joy, a feeling of obligation more than enhancement, then we need to take a step back a bit and put makeup in its place. We own it, it doesn’t own us. And the more we’re willing to let go the easier it will be for us to realize it.

And if anyone has any advice on helping my mom with her self-esteem, that would be great too.

Some Fabulous For Your Hands

Sometimes I can be trendy. I know, it surprises me too. And this post doesn’t have much of a point besides allowing me to gush about my two favorite things today, nude nail polish and my super kickass knuckle clutch.

I first saw this clutch not too long ago in Vegas. It had brass knuckles that looked like gorgeously gaudy jeweled skull rings, and lots of bling. It seemed like the kind of thing Lady Gaga would have, or some incredibly fashionable movie badass.

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I was kind of (ie very) drunk at that particular moment, so my picture-taking hand was less than steady. Nevertheless, can you imagine anything sexier?

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But I couldn’t really afford it, I mean there was a ton of shopping still to be done back at the Orleans. So I tore myself away.

Well guess what, bitches? One of the awesome ladies I was traveling with remembered my fondness for this thing, and let me know a couple weeks later about a sale going on at a local shop that sold them. And so behold!

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She is mine! And I couldn’t possibly be happier. These clutches are everywhere this season, and as far as google tells me, are inspired by clutches designed by Alexander McQueen. The real thing can cost up to $4000, but this looks about the same. Pictures don’t do it justice, this thing is sparkly. Now I can look great and beat up anybody who tries to rob me. What a perfect combo.

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alexander-mcqueen-knuckle-embellished-brocade-box-clutch

A couple of Alexander McQueen’s insanely gorgeous designs

But wait, let me add to that. My nails were painted a subtle gold and were a little streaky, with some ever so slight hair dye stains. So I thought I would redo them. I was going to do a nude base before redoing the gold, because the gel I have is a bit on the pink side. But when I saw the nude color alone…

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Well now I know why this too is so popular this spring. I think this is to die for, and I think I’ll keep it for a long time. Because my nails are long and pointy I don’t feel that dark colors are very agreeable on them, after all I’m not in music videos. And I’ve never been much of a dark nail color person anyway. But there’s something about this subtle color which is still very edgy. I used Sally Hansen Smooth and Perfect in Dune, and the brush really does allow you to put this on with no streaks at all. It’s pretty amazing. So put that all together and…’

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What do you think? I also really love the look of those nail polish strips with the fishnet design. That would be awesome. I’d say my hands are looking mighty fabulous this spring, wouldn’t you?